Friday, 9 November 2018

Prove That You are Human

Prove that you are human 
Prove you’re not a robot 
Answer this equation  
Click the called-for shots 

Prove you’ve learned subtraction 
Prove that you can see 
Prove you can distinguish  
Letters R and P  

Prove that you have blood 
Flowing through your veins 
Tell me of a secret crush  
Who doesn’t know your name  

Prove that you are living  
And not a wired mess 
Tell me of a memory  
You wish you could forget 

Prove that you are human  
And not a steel machine  
Tell me your favourite colour 
Tell me your sweetest dream  

Prove that you are human  
As you scour the internet  
Tell me what enrages you 
As if we’ve never met  

Prove that you are human  
State your birth and name 
Tell me what gives you hope 
Tell me how we are the same      

My Mother Had a Lazy Eye

My mother had a lazy eye 
Down the long dirt driveway 
She looked, lingering 
At the mailbox by the prairie road  
For a letter to arrive, 
A word to come from another world - 
Her uniformed older brother  
In combat fatigues  
Overseas, over there  

Her mother, Clara, had buried 
Her first husband and infants  
South of the border 
She soldiered on, 
Married a pint of a man  
Named Harry, 
Took in boarders  
In their farmhouse 
The ‘Tuckey Hilton’ 

Strange men knocked at the door 
With medals on their chests 
Smiles were missing  
As they shrugged at questions 
Heads silently bowing; 
My mother was there, 
Present, but looking away   

Sunday, 30 September 2018

Furry-ous Weather Report

There are poodles on the ground,  
Poodles, I tell you, not puddles 
The weather’s purr-fectly crazy  
It's a cat-astrophic muddle 

Gumboots and galoshes  
Just won’t do the job 
Because it's literally raining, 
Get this, raining cats and dogs 

Forget your umbrellas, 
Your bumbershoots, discard 
For it’s sprinkling springer spaniels,  
Himalayans and St Bernards 

You might get clawed at on the head 
Or drenched with disgusting drool 
My advice is, “Take your allergy pills 
And don’t send your kids to school” 

Cars are damaged, traffic is snarled 
And swerving into ditches 
The parking lots, or barking lots, 
Are littered with pussies and bitches    

It's best to stay at home  
And just watch it on the news  
‘Cause I just stepped into a cross  
Of a cockapoo and shih tzu